Saturday, 4 September 2010

Minced Frog

This is an old blog, taken from my Myspace page. Lazy? Yes.

Our garden was like a jungle. Weeds as tall as I am. Ok, I know I'm short but still, I'd say that's some impressive lazy gardening!

My mum refused to sit out there until it was sorted. I quite liked it all wild and jungle-esque. Especially the bee bush and the butterfly bush. Not so keen on the flying-ant paving step though.

So today we called on the garden man to come and sort it out for us. Took him a while but it's all sorted and looking lovely now. I've just realised how big our garden is!

The grass is. . . kinda brown now. And there's been no less than six ant nests uncovered. One big fat slug. One snail that's been through the mower. A baby bird (alive) and, the best part. . .

A minced frog! Now I was quite pleased with my discovery of the minced frog. If it didn't look so nasty, and I had a spade to hand, I would've scooped it up to show the whole family! As it was, with no spade to hand, I had to let my mum and brother know by describing it to them from across the garden. Kinda macabre, but I'm sure they loved it!

"Come and look at this frog!" I'm yelling excitedly like a hyper child. "It's been had by the mower, come and look!"

My mum tells me that she doesn't want to look at it. (Why not?!) And that she doesn't want to hear about it. (Crazy!)

"It's got a leg missing and everything!"

By this time mum's moved round the garden a bit, (she's inspecting garden man's work) and comes so very close to the minced frog.

I'm grinning inanely now. I really want to pick up this frog and show people. . .

"Look at its leg!" I'm just trying to share my joy with my mum, nothing wrong with that? She tells me to shut up. Charming. "You're gonna step on it!"

She looks. She groans. She doesn't share my morbid fascination.

My brother arrives. I give him a tour of the ants nests and show him the baby bird. We agree that it's fat and it's a robin.

"There's a frog too, come see!" So I lead him first to the mangled snail (got to start off slow, work up to these things) and then,

"Look!" I point. Wait for my brother's reaction.

He grins. "Gross!"

I nod, pleased. And return to the house.


  1. That is serious lazy!

    It was a funny post at the time though. I thought the title was familiar when I saw it!

  2. Yep, very lazy. And it was scheduled!